How to give a good massage.

Remember massages?

I'm not talking Swedish or shiatsu here, but the personal ones that came during the awkward early stages of romance. I.e. college.

You start dating someone special.
You like him.
You think he likes you.

And then... "the massage".  That's how you know it's getting serious.

At the end of your date he would say, "How about I give you a massage?" As if this offer wasn't as presumptuous as saying, "Let's go to bed together". When, of course, in reality, that was exactly what was being said.

Though, as the confident boundaried woman that I am, I think there were a few times when I allowed the massage, said thanks, and then went on my way. Suckers.

It's pretty excruciating to remember those awkward times. But awkward or not, getting a free massage was pretty awesome.

Plus, massages are really good for you. Stress relieving, detoxifying, etc.

Nowadays, massage usually means one of three things for me:

1. I am indulging in a rare treat and am lying on a table in a professional masseuse's room
2. B is giving me a 5 minute foot rub, which turns into 11 minutes after I beg and whine for more
3. I am preparing dinner.

Preparing dinner?!

Yup.

Herewith, a recipe for "massaged" kale:

In this recipe you eat the kale raw, which allows you access to all the nutrients and enzymes that get killed in the cooking process, making this recipe super healthy.


The important part of this recipe is the salt, which, as it gets massaged into the kale, helps to break down the cell walls and release it's water making it tender and easy to chew.

Raw Kale Salad with Oranges (Photo & recipe from Elana's Pantry)

1 bunch kale
1 tablespoon olive oil
1/4 teaspoon celtic sea salt
1 lime, juiced
1 teaspoon balsamic vinegar
1 tablespoon red onion, finely chopped
1 orange, peeled and sliced

   1. Chop the kale into thin ribbons
   2. Drizzle the kale with olive oil and sprinkle with salt
   3. Massage the kale with your hands to soften it, then allow it to sit for 5-10 minutes
   4. Add the lime juice, vinegar, onion and orange
   5. Allow to marinate for 10 minutes
   6. Serve

There are a lot of variations to this salad. I find just olive oil and lemon juice (plus Salt & Pep) to be delicious.
Last week I tossed leftovers of the salad in with some cold brown rice and it was delicious!

Now go give a massage. But remember, 99% of massages lead to something more...  So take caution.